“If-Then” Self-Defense

I am always interested in the studies of crime statistics, probabilities and scenarios. Certainly these studies yield important information and can act as prediction indicators of the occurrence of crime but the information they gather, simply put, are generalities. IF such and such is in place, THEN we may assume that x,y,z will follow. Basically, when it comes to crime indicators, I think the if-then scenario concludes the following predictability reliability: Sometimes. When it comes to predicting whether or not a certain person will commit a violent crime one must consider the individual with their ever changing experiences, chemistry and soul status. I am sure that even the most organic of us cannot predict with any certainty what another will do from one moment to the next.

No one is immune from crime. If we were, we wouldn’t need all those statistics, probabilities and studies to predict its occurrence in the first place. Life itself is an “if-then” scenario. If we are in the path of any number of scenarios that manifest into a violent crime, then we must know what to do. Danger is always brewing somewhere.

In terms of safety, we simply are safe until we are not. Sounds simple but it is true. Here’s another if-then scenario to think about. If you learn nothing, then you will know nothing. Although our basic instinct may be to survive in the face of danger, that often is not enough to actually survive. It is not enough to want to survive if you don’t know how.

Logically speaking, there are just too many threatening scenarios to think about preparing for. At the end of the day, we live with so many risks all around us that it just doesn’t make sense to consider them all and wonder which one we will most probably have to deal with. We rely on studies and statistics, to make educated choices about our safety based on our best guess of where we fit into those statistics and that is helpful, however, crime doesn’t always make sense therefore statistics can not be 100% accurate and only so much of our society can be patrolled at once.

Simply put you will never really know what is coming your way until it is happening.

The only thing we can really rely on is ourselves. The best defense to the myriad of risks that ebb and flow around each of our interactions in life is to know where we stand within them. By it’s very nature, violence is not a predictable event. If it were, no one would become a victim, and clearly, there are victims of violent crime every day all day long.

What safety really becomes is another if-then scenario. Simply put, if I am attacked, then I need to know what to do to survive. If I know what to do then it doesn’t really matter if I am attacked. I know how to defend myself so I will.  That skill will help me get out of trouble. It is the same way that I approach renting a car at the airport. If I know how to drive, then it really doesn’t matter what make or model they hand me the keys to.  If I know how to drive, then I will and increase my chances or arriving safely because I have the basic skill. You cannot always predict which threat in life you will have to deal with, but if you know how to protect yourself, then your chances of survival increase no matter what situation you find yourself in. But only if you have the skills.

We are not born with appropriate self-defends strategies because the nature of threats against us change with the climate of the era. However, it is essential that we do learn to protect ourselves because we never know which situation we will be handed. Without skills, we live a life of chance of which threat we may actually encounter, and common sense tells us that it is not a matter of If, but a matter of when.

~KBC

Mindset Self-Defenese offers workshops, products and a cutting edge magazine dedicated to the self-defense, personal protection and safety of women. Learn more at http://www.mindsetselfdefense.com

 

Domestic Abuse & Brainwashing

written by

Ellie Izzo, PhD, LPC and
Vicki Carpel Miller, BSN, MS, LMFT
http://www.vicarioustrauma.com

Domestic Abuse is an umbrella term that covers different dimensions of abusive relationships: verbal, emotional, physical, and spiritual. It is important to understand and recognize the traits of an abuser as well as the traits of being in the victim position in order to transform into healthy change. Here are some of the traits of an abusive partner:

• Competitive with his/her
• Quick with comebacks or put-downs
• Controlling
• Critical
• Lack of compassion
• Extreme
• Unable to be empathic
• Has difficulty listening
• Irritable
• Hostile
• Angers easily
• Shuts Down/goes dark
• Acts like a nice person to others
• Often is involved in one or more addictions

After living with this type of personality over time, the victim begins to experience a form of brainwashing. Here are the characteristics of brainwashing:
1. Omnipotence – the abuser behaves like he/she has all the power
2. Futility of the situation – the victim Is led to believe there is no way out
3. Threats – the abuser intimidates and undermines the confidence of the victim
4. Isolation – the victim is frequently barred from having outside attachments
5. Occasional Crumb – once in a while the abuser does something nice to keep the victim believing that things are going to improve.

Here is an example of the abusive system: Bill and Mary were married for three years and were very involved in their church activities. Bill was extremely jealous if Mary wanted to do any activity outside of work or the church, and would become threatened, and would proceed to “brainwash” his wife. Let’s look at the brainwashing cycle using Bill and Mary as an example.

1. Omnipotence – Bill was an elder in the church and wielded his power as a Godlike figure. He would speak down to Mary and criticize her imperfections.
2. Futility of the situation – Bill would denigrate Mary’s looks, her lack of education, and her confidence; often saying things like, “no one would ever want you.”
3. Threats – Bill would threaten that if Mary left him, she would be damned by the congregation and banned from the church, her primary support system.
4. Isolation – Bill prohibited Mary from being away from him by tormenting her with constant calls and texts when she was away from the home.
5. Occasional Crumb – when Bill sensed that Mary was maxed out from his abusive behavior, he would switch gears and temporarily act like the partner she always wished he would be.

If any of these red flags apply to you, please remember what you deserve to experience in your relationship:

• To communicate and feel heard and respected for your thoughts and feelings
• To feel safe and acceptable just as you are
• To not suffer personal attacks.To be able to accept constructive feedback without feeling worthless.
• To receive a genuine, heartfelt apology,without caveats or conditions.
• To be with a partner who can take responsibility for his/her anger and communicate it in a constructive way that serves to bring you closer together.
• The right to say “no.”
• The freedom to grow and experience outside interests.

If you find yourself in an abusive relationship, you will need help to debrief from the brainwashing and guidance to lead you out of the fog of conflict. Please seek the appropriate support and you will find your strength and renew your faith in yourself.

ONLINE RESOURCES FOR HELP

Emotional Abuse
www.eqi.org/eabuse1.htm

Understanding Emotional Abuse
www.focusonthefamily.com/abuse 

Emotional Abuse
www.women’s health.gov/emotionalabuse

Read more about Domestic Abuse in our March Issue of Mindset
http://joom.ag/3UOX

 

 

Know your Rights- The Law and Abusive Relationships

Arguably the most important part of life is to be in relationships with other people. A good relationship, whether with a family member, friend or spouse/significant other, is a great blessing.
However, human interaction is complicated, and sadly, some relationships turn sour and can become outright harmful. Abuse can be physical and/or psychological and can cause enormous harm to the person on the receiving end. What, if any, remedies does the law offer a victim of domestic abuse?

The tool most readily available is an Order of Protection, (also called a Restraining Order, an Injunction Against Harassment, etc.). Such an order, properly issued and served, prohibits the
perpetrator from having any contact with the victim(s) and can even prohibit the person from going near the victim’s home or work. One can be obtained by applying in person at the court nearest you. If contact occurs, the perpetrator can be charged with a crime, and if caught, they will be arrested even if the contact is nonthreatening or non-violent. A person convicted of violating a protection order will likely be ordered to complete a violence intervention program and could be sentenced to jail time.

When should you get an Order of Protection?
For instance, if your ex is messaging you 400 times a day about getting back together, and you have asked that they stop but it continues, you may want to consider getting a protective order.
Even if none of the messages contain any threats of injury, this can be harassing and stressful. Of course, if threats are uttered or physical violence is perpetrated, a crime has been
committed, which deserves police attention in addition to providing a reason for a protective order.

Once the order is signed by the judge, the person against whom it is issued (the Defendant) has a right to respond. Upon being served, the Defendant can request a hearing and contest the
allegations. Here in Arizona, any incident alleged must have occurred within the previous 12 months. If the incident occurred outside of the previous year, the order will be dismissed. An order is in effect for one year unless renewed for good cause, and they can be dropped early upon the request of the protected party.

If the relationship between the two parties is that of spouse, lover, significant other or parent of a joint child etc, the defendant is prohibited from possessing firearms during the duration of the order. If the defendant is caught possessing a firearm during while subject to an order, felony charges can be brought for “Prohibited Possessor of a Firearm.”

Due to being a cynic and apt to state the obvious, A protective order does not protect anyone from a person who ignores it. Earl; the man of song lyric notoriety “who walked right thru the restraining order,” comes to mind (The Dixie Chicks), but it is a tool that ups the ante on a perpetrator after the fact.

Always use common sense; in imminently dangerous situations call the Police!!! If the situation is ongoing, seek help from family and friends, religious or other non-profit organizations that focus on helping victims of abuse. In addition, many prosecutors’ offices have Victim Advocate Groups that assists crime victims during the perpetrator’s court process. Although not a legal system remedy; do not overlook martial arts training both armed and un-armed for the most extreme situations; the skills learned can be beneficial outside the realm of abusive relationships.

Notes of caution. There are two disturbing phenomenon surrounding protective orders. First, there are victims of SERIOUS PHYSICAL ABUSE who do not even report the incident to the police, much less have a protective order in effect! For your own sake and for the sake of those who love you, please do not find yourself in this category.

On the other hand, sometimes alleged perpetrators are framed by a person hiding behind a protective order and concocting accusations out of spite. For the sake of others, avoid belonging to
this category.On a positive note, many defendants report that they have greatly benefitted from the violence intervention classes they took after violating a court order. They have gone on to happier, more peaceful lives and healthier relationships.
-ME

Magnus Eriksson is a Criminal Defense Trial Attorney based in Scottsdale and is currently licensed to practice in the Sate and Federal Courts of Arizona. contact Magnus at: magnuse@cox.net

I Challenge You!

…to get the stats!

If you picked up a newspaper, (ok, I am over 30) errr, or googled the news, or better yet, contacted your local police department, you probably would be shocked to see the amount of crime that is going on in your neighborhoods.  My office is in Scottsdale, AZ., so that’s what I checked. I simply entered “scottsdale violent crime statistics” in the search field and here is what I found:

• Crime Rate

2010 Crime Rate Indexes	Scottsdale, AZ 85260	Arizona	United States
Total Crime Risk	63	143	100
Murder Risk	58	144	100
Rape Risk	32	98	100
Robbery Risk	29	102	100
Assault Risk	33	112	100
Burglary Risk	66	139	100
Larceny Risk	48	127	100
Motor Vehicle Theft Risk	96	220	100

The data for Scottsdale, AZ 85260 may also contain data for the following areas: Scottsdale

“Crime Risk Index (100 = National Average): Index score for an area is compared to the national average of 100. A score of 200 indicates twice the national average total crime risk, while 50 indicates half the national risk. We encourage you to consult with a knowledgeable local real estate agent or contact the local police department for any additional information. Crime Indexes are based on numerous current and historical datasets as well as proprietary modeling algorithms which estimate values at more granular geographic levels when specific data is either unavailable or impractical to aggregate. While every effort is made to ensure accuracy, these are estimates and should only be used as a guide. For detailed information regarding crime and safety in a community, please contact local law enforcement agencies.”

Hmmm, although I am glad that Scottsdale falls under the national average in some crimes  (which we all know is too much to begin with) I wasn’t exactly pleased with the murder risk value. Burglary and rape didn’t exactly relax me either, nor did an overall crime risk of 63 which inched up toward the national average, and this is “Scottsdale”. Look at the rest of Arizona. Not too pretty at all.

Having moved here from NYC, I was wondering what was going on in that neck of the woods.  So I picked an affluent part of town located by Lincoln Center and the Julliard School to search next. Here is what I found there, and the comparison to Scottsdale.

2010 Crime Rate Indexes	Scottsdale, AZ 85260	New York, NY 10023	United States
Total Crime Risk	63	133	100
Murder Risk	58	116	100
Rape Risk	32	80	100
Robbery Risk	29	432	100
Assault Risk	33	144	100
Burglary Risk	66	57	100
Larceny Risk	48	81	100
Motor Vehicle Theft Risk	96	111	100

If you live in Scottsdale, you may at first glance, think whew! (If you live in NYC this doesn’t surprise you, unless of course you live by Lincoln Center). However, Scottsdale, ask yourself two questions:

1. Am I comfortable with the levels of crime that does exist in Scottsdale? Let’s face it, its not zero. And..
2. Do I travel outside of Scottsdale, or do I live in a bubble?

I bet you’ve been to Tempe, a big college town as you probably know:

2010 Crime Rate Indexes	Scottsdale, AZ 85260	Tempe, AZ	United States
Total Crime Risk	63	162	100
Murder Risk	58	75	100
Rape Risk	32	117	100
Robbery Risk	29	115	100
Assault Risk	33	94	100
Burglary Risk	66	119	100
Larceny Risk	48	213	100
Motor Vehicle Theft Risk	96	288	100

OMG! Look at those numbers!  I am not saying this to scare you into taking care of your own personal safety and protection. I am saying it because it is happening. By the statistics in Scottsdale, 68% of you will not have a rape go to completion, however, 32% will! If you are in Tempe, the rape statistic goes up to 117, which is higher than NYC! Think again, where would you send your kids to school and what do we need to be teaching our girls??????

I want every woman to understand that learning to protect yourself is simply a VERY GOOD THING to know.

Stay safe out there, it’s Friday night. And we all know what alcohol and partying does to people’s judgment.

~KBC

 

3/1- Women’s Self-Defense Workshop Photos

The women who participated in the workshop alongside trainer David Bravo and his helper.

The Women’s Self-Defense Workshop on March 1, 2014 was such an empowering experience. Throughout the workshop participants became aware of several things;

1. There are so many misconceptions when it comes to self-defense & attacks against women.For example, the neighborhood is safe, using common sense will prevent attacks, and there is no way to get away from a stonger attacker,therefore compliance is best.

2. How to utilize tactical thinking instead of emotional thinking( getting past the anxiety) in life-like scenarios.

3. How to establish strong verbal boundaries and portray confidence so that we are not seen as a victim and therefore are less likely to become a victim.

4. That women have so many weapons to utilize if we are faced with an attack that have nothing to do with size, weight,or strength. We can do damage by using tactics like knee kicks, open handed hits, scratching ( we have nails!), biting, poking eyes etc.

Mindset’s new Personal Assistant (left of trainer David Bravo) along with two other women who participated in the workshop

A participant practicing the “Knee-Kick” tactic taught in the workshop.

What is being a Martial Artist?

What is being a martial artist and living

“The Martial Arts” Lifestyle?

I talk about lifestyle quite a bit, more specifically martial arts or the warrior lifestyle. So what is it?

I remember when I started training in martial arts; I was 11 years old and I started studying Kenpo Karate. My Sensei at the time had a “mat chat” with a group of us. There were 15 or so children in the group and Sensei had us huddle up for a story. Sensei started by asking us to imagine a set of twins growing up together in virtually identical ways. As they got older seemingly small differences started to emerge. One of the twins would get up early every day and review the school work he had done the day before and make sure he was fully prepared for the day ahead. The other twin would sleep in and rush to get ready at the last minute, sloppily throwing together what he needed for the day. The twin who got up early generally had enough time to eat a good, healthy breakfast and pack a good lunch for the day. The other twin would grab whatever was available and then buy chips and snacks from the vending machines. After school, the early bird twin would go home and immediately do his homework and make sure his tasks and chores were all finished. Following that he would spend the remaining hours exercising, riding his bike, or participating in other physical activities. The other twin would come home, eat fast food or candy, and then play video games and spend the minimum amount of time available to do some of his homework, often times not having enough time to finish it.

The story had more depth to the behavioral patterns in both twins but I do not remember them all. What I remember most was the construct of the story and the questions Sensei asked after. At the conclusion of the story, Sensei asked us kids what differences we saw in the twins. It was clear what they were, so the next question he asked us was, what would be the differences between the two in a week’s worth of time. Not much right? So, then Sensei asked what would be the differences in 6 months or a year? Well, at this point the conversation got real interesting. Some kids said that the one twin would be out of shape from playing video games all the time and eating junk food so much. Others talked about the twin having bad teeth and cavities due to the bad diet. Others talked about the poor grades the twin would get because he never did his homework completely, and was always ill prepared for the day ahead of him. This list went on and the funny thing is that we children really saw the side effects of the “bad” twin. Rarely did anyone comment on the side effects and successes the “good” twin would receive based on his lifestyle.

To read the rest of this article click here!

In Oneness,

Dedeuc D’Antonoli Sensei

Founder of the World Bushin Ryu Federation

Founder and Chief Instructor of The Budo Shingikan School of Japanese Martial Arts

www.MartialArtsMesa.com

Got info?

Interested in personal protection?
The latest trends in Martial Arts?
Or maybe you are interested in general well-being!
Sign up for our newsletter and stay in the know!
We only send when we have something to say,
We won’t fill your inbox with nonsense and we NEVER share!

  http://eepurl.com/IwhAD

   

   “Bring Sexy Back” Campaign

http://thndr.it/1lrKnLu

“THE MINDSET TEAM”

International Sportsmen’s Expo This Weekend

International Sportsmen’s Expo

http://www.sportsexpos.com/attend/2014/phoenix/

Come to the International Sportsmen’s Expo held at the University of Phoenix Stadium Thursday (2-20) thru Sunday (2-23) and visit with our fabulous partners:

PARTENRS AQUATIC CENTER FOR DOGS who work closely with Arizona Dock Dogs to train the dock world’s up and coming starts wil be holding a fabulous competition!

Stop by the GEAR UP CENTER booth and meet the inventor of the Crovel, Tim Ralston! He has some new innovative products to share with all who stop by!

TIM RALSTON, international spokesman and recurring featured survival expert on NatGeo’s #1 rated program DOOMSDAY PREPPERS, is also the innovator of several survival and outdoor adventure gear brands.  Tim integrated his lifelong love of the outdoors and adventure into founding Recon Outdoors and distributing under his Gear Up Center and Ralston brand. His company is an industry leader in developing, manufacturing and acquiring cutting-edge outdoor adventure and self-reliance gear.

With a heavy emphasis on branding American Made products, Ralston strives to bring the best possible gear to market while creating American jobs. Created from his military and adventure experiences, many of his innovations have received worldwide attention as the best self-reliance/outdoor multi-tools in the industry. Tim contributes and shares his philosophies on self-reliance and preparedness education through media venues such as: National Geographic Channel, Fox News, Anderson Cooper Live, Guns and Ammo, American Survival Guide and many more.

Women’s Self-Defense Workshop Offered – Scottsdale, AZ

INTRODUCING PREDATOR PERSONAL PROTECTION!

 This innovative Self-Defense training course is unlike any other. Real attack scenarios, real learning!

“What are you trained to do to protect yourself or a loved one in a violent attack”?

This workshop will:

Develop your skill to NOT become a victim, regardless of age or fitness level. You will learn “real world” techniques that will work on any attacker.

Build your confidence by teaching what you need to know to handle most violent situations and get home safely.

Learn to think tactically and instinctually, instead of emotionally and fearfully, to violence of threat of violence.

If you take just one step forward in personal protection, take this class.

__________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

Taught by David Bravo
4th Degree Black Belt
Personal Protection Expert
Tactical Response Trainer
Over 19 years experience.

Saturday: 2/08/2014
10:00am – 2:00pm
Price: $99

Client Registration is limited. Call Today.
602.909.0840

Juvenile Criminal Law Issues

by Magnus Eriksson

Juveniles are treated a bit differently than adults under the law. Generally, the juvenile system is geared more towards goals such as rehabilitation and second chances, and the adult system more towards punishment for criminal acts. Usually, juvenile defendants are not entitled to a jury trial, instead their cases are “bench trials” where a judge determines whether they are guilty or not. Here in AZ, the judges in juvenile court are often very experienced judges who spend the last few years of their careers on the bench on a less hectic assignment than heavy civil or adult criminal trial dockets. That for the most part ensures well-measured actions in response to criminal acts. Prosecutors in juvenile court, on the other hand, are usually relatively inexperienced, although a few grizzled veterans are thrown in for good measure. The defendants in Juvenile court are under 18 years of age when the (alleged) crime is committed, (there may be exceptions in some states) but some times they can be incarcerated beyond 18 years of age. In federal court, a juvenile can in extreme circumstances be incarcerated until they turn 26!

The range of punishment for acts of juvenile delinquencies can lead to participation in diversion programs, a period of probation or incarceration in juvenile prisons. “Diversion “is a program where in exchange for successful completion of a class such as substance abuse treatment, shoplifting deterrence programs or violence intervention classes, the charge is dismissed. Juveniles can also be charged and punished as adults for serious crimes. If a crime is initially charged as a juvenile offense, then the state decides to charge the juvenile as an adult, the accused has a right to have a transfer hearing, which could lead to a judge denying the request for transfer. The kind of crimes where juveniles are charged as adults are things like murder, gang shootings, rapes, drugs sales, child molestation, vehicular manslaughter and the like.

Some charges are unique to juveniles, such as curfew restriction violations, under age alcohol possession or use. Other crimes, like criminal speeding are applicable regardless of age, the only difference being the nature of the proceeding.

Juvenile convictions do not count against the person after they come of age. Often the records are sealed and only available to law enforcement entities. This system enables a person who has been in trouble to start anew without a public record of their past. Adult criminal systems usually do not have this type of mechanism. Sadly many criminal defendants commit crimes at the age of just over 18 years old, which can cause difficulties the rest of their lives. In some states, some adult convictions can be expunged after a certain period of time.

This is not an option here in Arizona. Here, one can ask a judge to vacate and set aside the judgment. Voting rights are restored this way and gun rights can be, unless the conviction involved the violent use of guns. Some type of charges are not technically juvenile charges but still deal with offenses where the perpetrator is too young to do something such as minor in possession or consumption of alcohol. Such charges are often dealt with through diversion programs but other related types of charges such using fake ID to get into bars, being considered “a crime involving moral turpitude” can stay on ones record forever depending on how they were charged. Driving Under the Influence charges are another issue that can be charged as a juvenile crime, if the person is under 21, or it can be charged as an adult offense when the person is over 18. The Under 21 DUI requires only the presence of alcohol in ones system the alcohol need not impair one’s driving. These types of offenses typically cause collateral damage such as driver license suspensions, revocations or restrictions such as requiring the installation of an ignition interlock device, sometimes for several years. Additionally, car insurance rates can increase or policies can even be cancelled.

While juvenile misdeeds are mostly secret after the age of majority, contemporary America is so complex and there are laws against virtually all conduct, it is important to be aware that the collateral effects of a conviction are often more severe than the direct punishment. In today’s soft job market a past conviction can make it very difficult to get a job or at least a job to one’s hopes and qualifications. Therefore it is imperative that we teach our children to be alert and cautious and aware about what they should and shouldn’t do. Of course, this can be much easier said than done. Not only is it easy to become a perpetrator of crime, it is also easy to become a victim of a crime. The electronic means of communication are marvelous but they can also be used for nefarious purposes. Adults pose as kids and try to arrange meetings with minors, personal information is stolen or obtained through deception, and then is used to fraudulently obtain credit cards and other financial benefits. Kids take pictures of themselves naked and text them to their boy friend/girl friend and in so doing possess and distribute child pornography. They are both perpetrator and victim of a crime and often don’t realize it! People text while driving and cause an injury accident because of the resulting inattentiveness to what is happening on the road. Such crimes require no Intent to cause harm, just recklessness. Harassment, bullying and other despicable acts are perpetrated using texts, instant messaging and other electronic means of communication.

Sometimes the laws are underdeveloped in these areas, although many “old” laws are directly applicable to these types of crimes and successfully used to punish perpetrators.

-ME