Change

With the release of our December/January 2016 issue, “Transitions,” last month, and the New Year upon us, it got me reflecting about change and life stages.

Editor in chief, Kris Costa, references a quote from Heraclitus in this issue’s From the Editor, “The Only Thing That Is Constant Is Change – ” In life change is constant and inevitable. In fact, besides death, change is the only certainty in this life. Change is present in all areas of our life, whether it’s in our relationships, jobs, society, or our character.

I used to be afraid of change, resisting it with every ounce of my mental strength. Every minor possibility of a change in my life would send me into a whirl wind of “what-ifs” that would paralyze me with fear. This year I struggled with the idea of change when it came to aging. I worried over the changes of time and how they have and will continue to affect my appearance. I thought about life transitions and how things won’t always be the same. One day I will be a mom. My body will change, my life will change, and my very dreams will change. Instead of being excited about this idea I found myself fearing it, almost dreading it. Not dreading being a mother, but dreading the changes over time, and how life seems to pass that much more quickly with little ones around. I was dreading that feeling a mother must get when her children grow up and no longer need her the way they once did.

Then I looked around at all my friends who have become mothers. I watched these women grow through our high school years, college, marriage, and now motherhood. These women have changed. They are no longer the same girls I knew in high school. Not once have I looked at their life and thought the changes they went through were negative. Instead, I marvel and admire these women who have morphed through the years into strong, intelligent, kind, capable, and beautiful women (inside and out). It is a beautiful thing to witness a person grow through so many life stages. It’s exciting to see how we will all continue to change and grow (and even age).

Eventually those friends that became mothers will be grandmothers, and I will be a grandmother too. That thought scared me. I was scared about the changes that will take place in my appearance over the years, and the changes that will take place socially. Will the memories of my younger days make me mourn my youth and want to go back? Will the smile lines on my face fill me with sadness or will they fill me with memories of all the laughter I’ve shared with friends and family throughout life? What about the knowledge, wisdom, and experience I’ll have gained in my life? I don’t think I will want to go back to being naïve or wondering how things will turn out or sweating the small stuff. There are many things that can be gained in the older years. One is being established in both family and experience. Aging means learning what’s truly important in life, and it means you have weathered the storms of growth and change.

This brings me to reflect on the changes I have been through in my life. Every time I sense a change coming I fight it. But why? Every change I’ve made so far has been a blessing. I changed jobs almost 2 years ago. I was very unhappy in my old job but I was still fearful to take a leap of faith into a new job. It was one of the best choices I ever made. Switching jobs, getting married, buying a house, were all changes that have been essential parts of who I am today. Quite honestly, I am so happy I am not the same person I was yesterday, or a couple years ago. I am happy to be the person I am today. I am sure with the growth opportunities before me, I will like future me even more!

Without change, there is no growth. This notion has proved to be true in my life. Sure, there were growing pains along the way. I think growing pains come from trying to hold on to who we were (and how we looked) when we were younger, all the while life is moving forward around us. But where is the beauty is staying stagnant? Isn’t that why life is so beautiful, the inevitable reality that we all change both internally and externally? From innocent bald headed, sweet smelling baby, to wise, warm grandparent, every stage of life is precious. Every stage requires growth that can only happen through changes.

I think it’s time for me, and for you, to see change for what it truly is, an opportunity for growth, and to welcome it with open arms.

~Micha Wilhoite

Time For Change

written by Kris Costa

The hearts at Mindset are deeply saddened by recent events at Umpqua Community College.

Unfortunately, it is my belief that this will not be the last school shooting to take place. The rash of violence spreading across the nation against our schools and the innocents within is nothing short of evil.

My appreciation goes to the first responders, medical responders, crisis centers and others, whose grim tasks now include and necessitate drill upon drill of reacting to such domestic terrorist emergencies. No longer carrying an element of sheer surprise, these tragedies have become scenarios whose practiced responses are now a matter of protocol in our American culture. The re-enforced skill sets of our task forces, and other emergency preparedness teams and individuals have no doubt increased the likelihood of surviving such a horrifying scenario, however, much needs to be discussed and implemented to avert the terrorist act in the first place. It is not enough to deal with the after effects. These occurrences MUST be eliminated. It is my opinion that the most influential to facilitate effective change in our own schools lie with us, the civilian public.

I often wonder how many parents have asked the serious questions to our schools regarding security and preventative measures, and if so asked, what are the responses?

Our government representatives and the like, will address various talking points around gun control, mental health, etc., all of which are vital and valid and necessary discussions to have, for quite some time to come. However, let us not forget that it is not the government’s responsibility to appoint school security to all the schools in the nation and regulate it. Our Legislative branch will provide rules to govern society, and the Judicial branch will set ramifications when violations occur. The police and others will respond to such violations. However, the job of keeping our schools safe lie with us, the proactive general public. It simply is not acceptable or effective to wait around in fear for someone, or some other body of people, to do the job we need to be doing, which is stand up for safety of our youth and other personnel in schools.

If you are a parent, have you questioned your child’s school on security procedures? Do you know what the procedure is concerning lock down? Do you know if those procedures are drilled with any regularity? What situations are covered? Most importantly, how is the school addressing preventative measures? How is the school physically secured? Are there increased security measures in place? Are there “No Gun Zone” signs posted? Does your school believe that is a deterrent? Would they consider additional preventative security measures if the budget for such could be supplemented? Would you pull your child/young adult out of the school if you were not satisfied with their answers? Is there a parent group formed and it is applying pressure (and support) to the school to make the hard decisions and take serious action?

This is only the tip of the iceberg. Do your children know how to adapt to life where they hear about school shootings in the news regularly? Do they really feel safe? And there is so much more.

If it is not worth the effort to find the answers to the above, and more so, to do everything possible in our power to protect our children in school, then we may loose a lot more lives waiting for others to address these issues on our behalf. I believe in prevention, and it begins in our own neighborhoods. Speak up, form a collective, offer solutions, pressure the schools to respond, financially contribute. It’s not about who “should” be doing what, it is about doing the best we can and now. Lives matter.

There are so many facets to the issue of school violence and violence prevention. Enforcing physical boundaries against it, before it happens, may just be the easy part.

Here is the real question: If we could go back to the day before each school shooting, knowing what we know now, would there be one thing that could be done differently? If the answer is no, then there is no need to pay attention to this post.

~KBC

Wandering Warrior- Qigong

Wandering Warrior- Qigong

By Jill Roth

THE MARTIAL ART
This month we’ll be entering the amazing world of Qigong with the gentle guidance of Bina Bou. Bina is a certified instructor of Qigong and Tai Chi who enjoys sharing her knowledge with her students in Cave Creek and other locations in the Phoenix, Arizona area.

DEFINITION OF QIGONG
I began with Bina’s website (www.binabouchi.com), which answers the question “What is Qigong?” Long used in training for the martial arts, Qigong is described by Bina as an exercise “designed to cultivate your Mind,Body, and your Spirit; and revitalize your Chi, the life force energy, by deep breathing and synchronized movements.”Qi or Chi means energy—a resource so essential it is impossible to define or translate Gong or Kung means to cultivate—a practice or methodology.

Qigong, therefore, refers to the exercise of one’s internal energy, and is a path to Mindfulness. Intention – Attention – Repetition – Guidance.

While everyone has Qi, most people don’t know how to tap its potential for healing and stress management. Qigong training allows practitioners to learn to relax and develop their mind-body connection. Through slow and gentle movements, Qigong has the practical benefits of providing balance and enhancing the body’s own natural healing—benefits which are documented in numerous medical publications.

With this background on the Qigong tradition, I attended one of Bina’s classes. To warm up, the group of about 24 gathered together in a large circle. You could feel the effervescent energy rippling around the room. We started with some wonderful, uplifting music and reflexology for the feet. We accomplished this
by walking in a giant circle, first on our toes, then on our heels, followed by the outsides of our feet, and finally on the insides of our feet. Next, we continued to walk while kicking out to the front, and then kicking our tushes, kicking out sideways, and lastly, marching with our knees up high. The room was filled with smiling faces, exuberant walking, and good cheer. Oh, and did I mention that the participants in the class ranged in age from 55–83?

Qigong can be used for its martial, healing, or meditative aspects. Bina says that Qigong is the mother of all martial arts, and that with slight variations it can be used for each of these goals. According to Dr. Jwing-ming Yang, a well-known teacher and author in the field, there are two separate trains of thought in the Qigong schools focused on martial arts. One, Nei Dan, believes that one should build Qi in the body and then have that spread to the limbs to increase their martial effectiveness. The other, Wai Dan, follows the belief that you should build up the Qi in your limbs and then have it flow inward to your internal Qi. This type of Qi can be used to “energize the skin and the muscles, enabling them to resist a blow without injury.” Both schools teach that by harnessing the focus of the mind (Yi), you can send Qi to the muscles and increase your fighting effectiveness. The progression of acupuncture theory also increased the effectiveness of Qigong as a martial art. By gaining a thorough knowledge of the acupuncture meridians, a Qigong practitioner would know the most effective cavities to hit and the necessary depth at which to strike. This combination of knowledge had made for a formidable martial art.

The meditative aspects of Qigong can be as simple as enjoying the focus and stress release of the movements, or as in-depth as the intense Marrow/Brain Washing, a level of training revered and kept secret from all but a handful of practitioners in every generation. To learn more about this area you can read the Marrow/Brain Washing Classic by Da Mo. Da Mo wrote this book about energizing the brain and attaining enlightenment after nine years ofseclusion in a Shaolin Temple.

Bina Bou has focused her practice on the healing properties of Qigong. I was impressed by how her students were brimming with health. Don’t be mistaken— many of her students have faced and overcome health obstacles that would have stopped others in their tracks. Take, for example, Debra, who developed a serious illness and was having difficulty with stamina and balance. Debra had been in a wheelchair before she started working with Bina. After a few months of Qigong practice, Debra was helped to the extent that she is now walking freely. But more on this later; back to the class…

Read the rest of the article and get facts about Qigong on pgs. 40-43

By Jill Roth

Are You a Heart Saver? Saving Lives One Heart at a Time.

Are You a HeartSaver? Saving Lives One Heart at a Time.

By Kris Costa

Let me tell you a about a relative who had a heart attack in a mall one afternoon in December. Wisely, and frankly uncharacteristically, he made his way to the shoe department of Macy’s, which luckily was near an exit door, and complained to a cashier of pain in his chest. The ambulance arrived quickly and loaded him in. En route to the hospital, he went into cardiac arrest.

Fortunately, he was in trained hands who administered CPR and swiftly used an AED (automatic external defibrillator) to shock his heart and bring his pulse back. By the time I arrived, he was in the ER, laying in the recovery position (on his left side)—ashen and still, but alive. Alive, with the necklace he bought for his wife still clutched firmly in his hands. In the weeks to follow, as we celebrated the holiday season,
my family was acutely aware of how very close we had come to spending this time in a very different, very dreadful manner.

There is much to learn from this story. One thing for sure is to not ignore the signals that our bodies communicate to us. Another lesson is to call for medical help immediately, as the cashier did. Had one or two of those elements not been acted upon exactly as they had, this gentleman may not have been in the ambulance when he arrested. And what if he had not? Would another set of capable hands been available to save his life? Did anyone in the store know what an AED was, or where it was? I am grateful to leave that an open question in my mind. However, there is another lesson to be learned from this experience. What if someone were to go into cardiac arrest in front of YOU? Would you know what to do to save a life?

My relative was shopping alone that December afternoon, but what of the person whose family is standing witness, screaming for help to those who are unable to provide any? That sort of helplessness is a hell all its own—and it happens every day. People watch as others die. Anyone can learn CPR—and everyone should.

WHY TAKE ACTION?
• Failure to act in a cardiac emergency can lead to unnecessary deaths.
• Effective bystander CPR provided immediately after sudden cardiac arrest can double or triple a victim’s chance of survival, but only 32% of cardiac arrest victims get CPR from a bystander.
• Sadly, less than 8% of people who suffer cardiac arrest outside the hospital survive.
• The American Heart Association trains more than 12 million people in CPR annually, to equip Americans with the skills they need to perform bystander CPR.

THE GOOD SAMARITAN LAW:
The Good Samaritan Law protects individuals who assist a victim during a medical emergency. Every state in the United States has a Good Samaritan Law or Act to protect individuals who offer reasonable aid during a medical emergency.Since a Good Samaritan typically does not have medical training, the law protects him or her from being liable from injury or death caused to the victim during such assistance. As long as a layperson has good intentions to aid the victim to the best of his or her ability during a medical emergency, he or she is protected under the Good Samaritan Law. Under some Good Samaritan Laws, as long as medical personnel, such as doctors, nurses, or medical responders, are following normal procedures, they too will be protected under the Good Samaritan laws. Each state law has specific guidelines.

AUTOMATIC EXTERNAL
DEFIBRILLATORS:
Automatic external defibrillators (AED) save lives. An AED is a portable device that checks the heart rhythm and if indicated, can deliver an electric shock to the heart to try to restore normal rhythm.

CPR/AED classes are taught nationwide, and many are taught for free. CPR/AED can be learned in one day, in just a few hours. Contact your local Fire Department for more information. Make sure the CPR course you inquire about also teaches AED. Many also teach child and infant CPR/AED, adult and child choking, and first aid. There is no excuse not to learn these life-saving techniques. Get going, get trained, learn how and when to use your training, and be prepared! You may never know when you may be called upon to save a life.

Kris Costa
Editor in Chief Mindset Self-Defense Magazine

RESOURCES:
CPR/AED:
htp://www.redcross.org/take-a-class – (also offers pet CPR course).
http://www.heart.org/HEARTORG/CPRAndECC/CPR_UCM_001118_SubHomePage.jsp
Or contact your local Fire Department.
PET CPR:
http://www.pettech.net/index.php
GOOD SAMARITAN LAW BY STATE:
http://www.heartsafeam.com/pages/faq_good_samaritan

Read our article on pg. 34-35 with facts from the American Heart Association.

Self- Worth: The Cost of “Being” is Free

Self- Worth: The Cost of “Being” is Free

By Kaiden Blake

Self-worth is the fuel that enables us to live out our lives to our fullest potential. Most people, however, are living on “empty”—too preoccupied with the day-to-day to notice the flashing red light on the dashboard.

MIND
The truth is, we can’t think our way to self-worthiness. The human brain is programmed to navigate the world by way of processing information in a logical, dualistic format. For example: this is right, that is wrong and she’s a woman, he’s a man. When our mind tries to conceptualize the notion of self-worth, it’s automatically subjected to the realm of duality. Using our minds alone to understand our self-worth is like trying to stargaze with a pair of binoculars. Since self-worth is such a delicate and unique factor in each individual person, it needs to be honored as such. The mind insists on sequestering us away into nice, orderly groups, but surrendering to that method and mentality is harmful and unrealistic in regard to the deepest parts of ourselves.

The mind resides very closely to the ego, which is one of the most powerful detractors in our mission to achieving a sense of worth. The ego is never satisfied, and so our minds work overtime to try and compensate. When that happens, over-thinking and self-doubt are guaranteed to take over. Our minds will replay old tapes of who we thought we should be and will resurface all of the projections others have placed on us. It will re-hash doubts, insecurities, mistakes, and poor habits we’ve clung onto throughout our life. We’re rendered useless if we’re living in that headspace, as we’re taking on an imaginary script—a dialogue between fear and lack. We must see through this illusion, knowing that we’re far greater than to submit ourselves to the never-ending egoic cycle that readily offers itself to us. Instead, we must create our own script.

The objective isn’t to think our way to self-worthiness—the objective is to choose what we think about. This is paramount to our success. Though our thoughts often seem like innocent static noise, they’re hard at work at creating our reality. Since our thoughts have a profound effect on our psyche, they evoke strong emotions within us. Because we’re highly emotional beings, emotions can often seem to create our reality. While we want to fill up our lives with positive, life-affirming emotions, it’s unhealthy to live vicariously through a purely emotional state. Making decisions based on emotions alone is like building a skyscraper on a loose foundation. Next time you find your mind racing with unwanted thoughts or emotions, try to snap yourself out of the false created reality. Your true inner self never wants you to feel less than, for you are far greater than your thoughts and emotions.

BODY
Don’t ever believe that bodies are things that happen to other people. While everyone is aware of and acknowledges they have a body, few embrace them—and even fewer really listen to them. Self-worth is just as important on a physical level because our bodies are the vessels that carry our souls. We have a right to our bodies, and our bodies have a right to be treated in our highest regard.

We’ve been programmed from a very young age what to feel about our bodies. Television, media, and society have dictated what’s attractive, what fashions are acceptable or unacceptable and the implications they have, and how we’re meant to view the bodies of others. Because we’ve been fed that script, we’ve forgotten to not only live with our bodies on our own terms, but we’ve forgotten how to really tune in and listen to our bodies.

Here are some questions to ask yourself. Please answer honestly; your ego will want to rear up and get defensive, but the first step to true healing is being fully honest with yourself.

– Am I comfortable in my body?
– Do I feel comfortable in my body around others?
– Am I expressing myself for me, or for the validation of others?
– Do I treat my body well through my thoughts and actions?
– Am I putting harmful toxins, chemicals, and food in my body?
– When was the last time I did something positive to celebrate my body?

Many of you who answered those questions will realize how often our bodies fall by the wayside on our list of priorities. The truth is, our body never lies. Often times when we feel under the weather, our truest “self” is trying to get our attention by the only means it knows how. Instead of writing off every headache, stomach ache, or sense of unease, try to tune in to the feeling and let your body give you a message. Though many will scoff at the notion of listening in on the body, many people have overcome lifelong illnesses by doing so. It’s a matter of being fully in sync with the body. The healthier we treat our bodies and the more aware of them we are, the easier it is to prevent anything untoward or harmful from entering or permeating our lives.

It’s important to be gentle with ourselves and to acknowledge the uniqueness of our bodies. Every single being on this planet is a divine miracle. Life here on Earth has a habit of getting in the way of our inner knowingness of how incredible we are and how much potential each and every one of us has to offer. Our bodies are the vessels that enable us to reach for our dreams and to connect with others in the most wonderful of ways. Instead of taking on others’ projections of your body or your own insecurities, try celebrating your body. Know that you’re worthy and deserving of great health and opportunities. And most importantly, worthy of self-love.

SOUL
Like our mind and body, our self-worth on our soul level stems from within—not from outside sources. It doesn’t come from jobs, credentials, or monetary gain. Believing in oneself can certainly pave the way to gain those things, but how we adorn our lives on the outside cannot fulfill the need within. It only, at best, can give us a sense of complacency. One of the biggest blocks to achieving self-worth is giving our power away to others.

Because of the constant chatter from our egos and the harsh world we live in, we lose faith in ourselves. Once we fall out of touch with our innermost sense of self, we base everything on outside sources. Instead of seeking approval from someone or something else, try asking yourself for it. And when you answer, try listening. Pay very close attention to your gut instincts. If you’re still feeling lost, ask the universe for a sign. Signs and confirmations can come to us in the most unsuspecting of ways—words we pick up at random, songs that come on the radio, or something we overhear in a passing conversation. One of the best tools we have is to simply listen. When human beings struggle, we often lash out—either out of frustration or desperation. When we really sit with ourselves and let go of all the noise from our thoughts and ego, we’re able to more easily get a firm grip on the situation or question at hand.

In addition to learning how to listen, let go of what you’ve been conditioned to believe about yourself. Connect yourself fully with the entire universe itself, and ask: “What is it within me that can make a positive, profound impact on the world?” Include yourself when you think of the world and the people around you. Instead of separating yourself and feeling isolated, know that you play just as important a part as everyone and everything else. In the highest truth, there is no separation. Once you step back into your power and cherish yourself, you’ll notice yourself going with the natural flow of life rather than against it. By fully actualizing your self-worth, you’re gifting yourself the ability to use the wings you’ve always had but forgot along the way.

Be you, and fly to great heights like I know you can.

AFFIRMATION
“I honor and respect my truest self and all of the complexities that are within me. I am whole, worthy, and able. I have the confidence, freedom, safety, and security to fully be me at all times. I will not let my own ego or the words and actions of others to disempower me. I trust and believe in myself, and I am fully capable of accomplishing my dreams. I am me.”

Read it on page 17-18.

Kaiden Blake

Kaiden Blake is a recognized internet personality and artist, is currently anticipating the release of his forthcoming book. Kaiden’s incredibly strong bond with his fans, inspire personal empowerment across the globe.

MISS DEMEANOR- Willpower, The Not So Invisible Force

MISS DEMEANOR

Willpower- The Not so Invisible Force

It calls to you like a sweet lullaby, lurking beneath the pasta and cereal, but you remind yourself not to give into the temptation. Regardless, your hand reaches for it anyway; without the consent of your brain. Just as your finger-tips touch the plastic wrapper of the last chocolate bar in the cupboard, your brain finally takes hold and snaps your hand back into your jean pocket. What is this invisible force that has hastily retracted your hand from indulging in sweet surrender?

That force is called willpower. It comes in many different strategies and many different forces, yet sometimes it does not even come at all. Sometimes when we are in need of it most, the will-power to not do something is nowhere to be found.

There are many people who feel that willpower has a mind of its own, but in reality we are the ones who hold the neck of it. We are the ones who steer it in the right direction and steer it in the wrong direction. There are plenty of us out there that have enormous amounts of willpower, but believe that we have none. This is because willpower can very easily be wrongly directed. Often times, people believe that they could improve their lives if only they had a little more of that willower we all have instilled within us. The truth is that willpower is not
as invisible as we think. It lives within us, waiting to be utilized in the healthiest way. It would be easier if it went dormant for decisions that do not benefit us, but that is not the
case. The key to willpower is using it for the right things and sometimes this process takes people years, but it does not have to be that way.

Personally, I struggle with the willpower to make the right decisions every day of my life. There is not an hour that goes by throughout my day when I do not reference the back of my brain and ask my willpower a couple of questions. The problem for me is not whether or not I have willpower. I know I have the willpower and I know that the willpower that I have is not weak. I struggle with steering it in directions that are best for me. There are many times when I take a situation and pick it apart to pieces, looking at the positives and the negatives, sometimes for hours. I contemplate what the right decision is and by the end of the day I know what the right
decision is. Seems pretty straight forward, right? Knowing the right decision and then just to do it! However, that is nearly ever the case. The right thing to do is usually the hardest and often times, I lean towards the opposite direction. It is my willpower that then hits me in the face, spins me around and shoves me towards the route that my mind knows is best.

As a young woman, I am faced with challenges each day and I am persuaded into following the wrong path. For years, I let my heart hold me by the neck and override what I knew was the best
thing to do. Whether the decision was staying in a friendship that was unhealthy or a relationship that was damaging, there was always something that my heart and my head were fighting about. If there is one thing that I have learned thus far in life, it is that barely ever do my heart and my head agree. What my heart wants, my brain often knows better. Life is a constant battle between emotion and reason. If we can find a way to let our willpower settle
this ongoing battle between the two, only then may we find peace. I believe that, with practice and a little bit of willpower, that battle can come to an agreement. It won’t be without a little blood, sweat, and tears, but it will be worth it. There is nothing worse than feeling like you have no control over your mind, body and soul.

By no means do I have the whole process figured out, but that’s what makes life so interesting. The fight is what we get up for in the morning. The human body is capable of experiencing so many
different things, so many great things and so many terrible things. Life can truly be so incred-ibly intriguing and beautiful if it is utilized in the right way. That energy that pushes a person to run the last mile of a triathlon or the force that drives a person to pluck the strings of a guitar is the same energy that creates the burning sensation on your lips when you kiss a lover or that crippling sensation that pulses through your veins when you lose a friend. Those are the things that true willpower thrives on and will grasp onto. If you believe in
yourself and have faith that you are capable of achieving your goals, true willpower will follow.

It is funny how many people believe that willpower is this invisible, mysterious force that science cannot define. Willpower is defined by what you make of it. You can use it to stick a needle in your arm through beat up veins and bruises or you can use it to write the last page of a midterm exam. Willpower is not so much invisible, but more so waiting for you to sculpt it into what you want it to be. Life is what you make it. So is your determination, ambition and willpower. Make the right decisions and do what is best for you in your life. Other people can
help you find where to channel that energy, but at the end of the day it is up to you and no one else. When you’re lying in bed at night thinking about everything in your life, remember that you are in control of a lot more of it then you think.

~ Alexandra Costa

Alexandra was born in Red Bank, New Jersey and moved to Scottsdale, AZ with her family in 2002. She is currently pursuing her college degree in English and Psychology.

Willpower: Practice Makes Perfect

Willpower: Practice Makes Perfect
By Dan Ronin

I remember one night long ago. I was in my back yard practicing Iaido (Japanese sword form) and having difficulty with how the cut ended. No matter how many times I practiced the cut the end was less than satisfactory. My practice finished with me feeling despondent about my ability. It made me question whether or not I had it in me to be a competent Martial artist and if I was wasting time that could be better spent doing something else.

The following nights I continued to practice again and again and again. After doubting myself I decided that it was the practice that made me a martial artist, not my ability. If I continued to practice the only thing that could happen is that I would improve. But why? Why not. Who cares? No one. What difference does it make? Not a thing, except to me.

Ask any athlete, martial artist, artist or anyone who really specializes in something, how they became as good as they are at what they do and you will probably hear, practice. That is generally speaking not what most people want to hear. More than that, it is very difficult to dedicate yourself to regular practice sessions.

You really have to find whatever it is inside of you that will constantly renew and restore your interest in what you are practicing so that you don’t quit. It seems that in today’s world if we can’t become an expert in 20 minutes it isn’t worth it so we give up. Some people are fortunate enough to have a natural ability toward something. The rest of us have to try harder!

One of the most important lessons I have learned is the lesson of perseverance. No matter what happens in life we have the power in ourselves to overcome the hardships and adversities placed before us if we simply carry on. Quitting or giving up is the polar opposite of willpower. Willpower is the well you draw from to help overcome adversity. You are correct in your beliefs no matter what you believe. By that I mean; If you don’t think you can do something, you are right! If you think the task is too hard or the distance too far, it is! However the opposite is not only true but more powerful then most people can imagine. You can never give 110%, the math is bad. You can give 100% though and I challenge you to.

Next time you are doing something you may not be fully into, try giving it 100% and see if it makes a difference. Through the power of your will you can accomplish anything you put yourself 100% into. It starts by setting a goal and seeing yourself accomplishing that goal. Once you set a goal and do something everyday towards that goal you will reach it guaranteed. However there is more than that. Once you learn the strength of your will you can direct it where it is needed. If you truly want to meet someone, go to a certain college or work for a certain company it will happen. Beyond that once you fully understand your potential you will realize that there is nothing you cannot accomplish if you apply yourself. In addition if your will is strong no one can coerce you into doing something you don’t want to! Learn to harness your willpower and your life will change forever!
-Dan Ronin

Dan Ronin has trained in the martial arts for over 30 years. He is a combat veteran who served as a Military Police Investigtor in the Army for 8 1/2 years. Dan offers classes in Counter-Attack self defense for open hands and weaponry, as well as disaster/emergency preparedness.
Contact Dan at dan@roinproducts.com or 602-373-9630

Venues- Antigua

Venues-Antigua

By Kris Costa

Antigua and its parishes are home to some of the world’s most magnificent beaches! White sand, crystal blue water, and picturesque sunsets abound on this beautiful island. But that’s not all.

Antigua has something for everyone. A popular cruise ship destination, the port city of St. John will not disappoint, as it offers brand name shopping on Market Street as well as island original creations on the streets which extend past this port street center. The bustling duty free port is known for glistening jewelry, fabulous beach attire and colorful island creations. Additionally, Antigua boasts many historical landmarks and local points of interest. A quick drive through the local parishes will quickly endear a feeling of belonging as one can see children walking from school, local businesses in action, and even a game or two of soccer amidst the islands sugar cane plantations.

Hotels are plentiful along Antigua’s gorgeous coastlines and range from quiet and personal to teeming with activity. If your choice is to spoil yourself with activity based accommodations, water sports or sailing, Antigua has it. If your whim is more in line with complete relaxation amongst beautiful flora and romantic charming moonlit dinner, Antigua has that too. Whatever your preference, Antigua’s enticing turquoise waters will beckon your every call. All is yours on this fantastic island which offers many activities in an unpretentious atmosphere. Never obtrusive, simply available to tend to your every need, Antigua’s most endearing resource is its people. Charming, accommodating, playful, polite, seeing them is like coming home. On an island where there is virtually nothing left to wish for, Antigua’s friendly people top off the most wonderful of experiences. You will arrive a stranger and leave with friends, and you will always remember their smiles.

A r t w o r k , c u l t u r e , m u s i c, entertainment, restaurants, even a casino make this island a superb choice for every vacation taste. For those of you who just cannot bear to depart this lovely island, there are still a varied amounts of land acquisition opportunities. Hmmmm, now there’s a thought.

No stranger to the pallet, Antigua local cuisine is mouthwatering. Typical local dishes include salt fish, eggplant, local lobster, a variety of vegetables, seasoned rice scalloped potatoes and plantains. Antiguan butter bread is a main staple, with its soft buttery flavor. The bread pudding is not to be missed for dessert!

There is nothing quite like an outdoor massage while the trade winds blow, and Antigua’s hotels will pamper you at your whim. At their organically appointed spas, some even constructed in Gauguin cottages on stilts and draped with crisp white curtains blowing in the breeze, Antigua spas take indulgence to a new level. Of course, Antiguans are just as happy to bring comfy tables, linens and oils to your room terrace to provide your spa service as you listen to the waves break on powdery shores.

Antigua’s sister island, Barbuda, is 27 miles off Antigua’s North Coast. This coral fringed island is renowned for its tranquility, crystalline waters, deserted beaches and lobster. Easily accessible from Antigua aboard the Barbuda Express ferry, or an any other number of boating options, Barbuda can also be reached in less than 10 minutes via VC Bird international airport.

Article continues…. Pgs. 15-16

-KBC

SOUL FOOD- Fried Ice Cream

SOUL FOOD
Fried Ice Cream

Ingredients:
• 6 scoops Vanilla Ice Cream
• 1 Cup Graham Cracker crumbs
• ½ tsp cinnamon
• 1 Egg
• 1 T Half-and-half
• Vegetable Oil (enough to make ¼-1/2 inch of oil in bottom of pan)

The Process:
1. Scoop Ice Cream into balls and freeze for two hours.
2. Mix Graham Crackers and cinnamon.
3. Roll ice cream balls into the mixture and refreeze for at least 30 minutes.
4. Beat egg and cream until well blended
5. Roll Ice cream balls into egg mixture and reroll in graham cracker mix.
6. Freeze until firm.
7. Freeze until firm. Heat oil to 375 degrees, fry until coating begins to brown. About 10 seconds.

To make homemade whipped cream. Whip 1 Cup of heavy whipping cream, 3-4 Tablespoons of confectioners sugar and 1 teaspoon of vanilla until fluffy.

See the article on pg.45.

-Jill Roth

The Gift of Hope

The Gift of Hope
By Kris Costa

Thinking about the holidays brings different thoughts to different people. To some, the holidays bring thoughts of festive occasions,family gatherings, warm fuzzy feelings of love, hugs and togetherness amidst the aromas of baking cookies and hearths ablaze. A deeply religious and faith filled experience, the holidays may bring some a chance at a renewed spirit, a reconciliation of the heart, a purification of soul and a humbling to the virtues of life that cannot be bought, boxed, or wrapped at any cost. Then of course, there are the children who excitedly await the long holiday break from school, sleeping late in the morning and receiving gifts in celebration of their faiths.

Then there are others…
Others who miss, others who despair, others who disappear. They live among us, but they are invisible. They see us, but we
often do not see them. They are breathing, but they are ghosts.They are the broken, the disheartened, the suffering, the abused, the confused, the lonely. They exist outside of time, outside of conventional functional reference points, outside of happiness, and outside of an inner light. But they shouldn’t.

I believe every human being who is born possesses a unique energy. Energy is evidenced when a baby is crying, breathing, moving, etc. This comes from somewhere else and exists for a reason. Every human being is also born with a brain and a capacity to learn. For some, even at this early point of human existence, some things may go terribly wrong. For
others, catastrophic and tragic events can occur further along in life, either with singularity, or in a series, and still there are some who suffer a series of hardships that become just too heavy to bear. Crushed under the cruel weight of circumstance, something falls apart within them. There are often times, even the strongest cannot hold on to that blade of grass that sees the sun, and then, they disappear.

Who would you be if you were totally alone? What would you enjoy if you had no one to share it with, would anything even
matter?

Not withstanding those whom harm others as a way to feel even a flicker of movement within, I am addressing those who are lonely, those who are abused, those who are poor, those who are suffering or sick, those who are making an effort to serve somehow, or just to survive on their own. They are part of our communities, part of our culture.

However, In a time when independence and distance from family, speediness of technological communications, multi-cultural expression and lifestyle freedoms are becoming more and more accepted in societies around the world, the meaning of “it takes a village” seems at times to be long forgotten. But it does take a village. Shouldn’t acceptance bring villages closer together? Or is it just that “allowance” has increased and not necessarily “acceptance”? Allowance is very different than acceptance. Allowance means permission, but not in my neighborhood. Acceptance is practiced differently.

So how does one practice acceptance? One answer to that question is though service, to each other. Do you live near a
hospital? Become a hugger. It is not a secret that hospitalized babies who are held more get healthier faster, but awareness of infant hugging programs may be elusive. Seek these programs out. In a study published in the 2003 Journal of Pediatric Psychology, results showed that preterm infants who were held and stroked were calmer, gained weight faster and slept better. This was ten years ago. Today, too many hospital nurses are too busy, parents may be absent or ill, and volunteers are a needed and cost effective solution to provide this necessary human contact to infants who are in desperate need. Training and background checks are necessary for volunteers but the time and effort involved seem well worth the investment. Volunteers who help babies heal report that they, themselves, benefit the most.

Read the rest of the article on pages 12-13

Kris Costa
Editor Mindset Self-Defense Magazine
Born and raised an only child in New York City, and exposed to Law Enforcement from an early age, Kris learned the benefits of situational awareness, setting boundaries and enforcing them, as essential components of daily life. During her college career, Kris studied journalism, television production, corporate and criminal law, and frequently was called upon to assist on news gathering assignments throughout the city, either as a reporter or part of the production crew. Driven by an entrepreneurial spirit, and her desire to protect the beauty of the human spirit, Kris brought her vision to life through Mindset Publications in July 2013. In her spare time, Kris’ enjoys the theatre, and travels extensively, with frequent visits between the west coast and her hometown.