Act Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

“Instead of explaining why you’re complaining, change your reality altogether.”

MIND:

When we think of what holds us back, we generally think of things outside of ourselves. It’s our rational mind’s way of finding a source for the “problem” and the ego’s way of shirking off responsibility and true independence. While the people, places, and situations around us may not be ideal, our reality is contingent upon the state of being we choose to create from within.

Many of us are familiar with those people in our lives who will seize any opportunity to complain about their current situations. Not only will they complain, but they’ll endlessly explain their justifications. When these people receive help, however, they typically reject it outright or don’t put enough faith and trust in the potential solution in order for it to make a significant change. This is because these types of people aren’t actually looking for their situations to change; they’re simply lost in their created cycle and refuse to make the necessary changes to get out. After all, doing the same thing over a long period of time can bring us to a nice sense of complacency, no matter what the situation is like.

The next time you feel the desire to complain or explain why you’re complaining, try using the same amount of effort to come up with creative solutions around the issue at hand. When we focus on the negative aspects of a situation, we will call more of that into our lives. Instead, focus on what it is that would make you feel happy, fulfilled, and abundant. Do this until you can feel it in a real, visceral way, and don’t be afraid to “dream big.” When you’ve captured that feeling, hold onto it and fuel that energy into all that you do, all that you feel, and all that you are.

Ironically, many of the times we face opposition or feel as though we’re dealing with a problematic situation, we’re not dealing with our own issues at all, but rather the issues we’ve taken on from others. For example, we all have met people who’ve said “I wish I could do ______ with my life.” Though what’s filled within the blank often seems farfetched, most times it’s quite achievable, albeit sometimes by being tweaked a bit. As beings living on this Earth and within the scrutiny of “society,” we tend to shoot ourselves down before we’ve had a chance to fly. We think, we feel, and we stop. What we should really be doing is thinking and feeling less about our current situations and instead take action to gain tracking on our future. Then, once we’ve made several real attempts, we can better gauge where we are and what we can put in place to get to where we want or need to be.

Your effort should always be indicative of what you desire. If you’re willing to complain about something 10 times a day, you should be just as willing to put the effort forth to usher change into your life 10 times a day. If these numbers don’t match, be honest with yourself. The goal is to reach a point in which you don’t feel it necessary to complain at all and naturally strive to change your life in positive, impactive ways. If you’re living solely in your mind rather than creating your physical reality, you’ll never be satisfied. Don’t be afraid to make what seem like mistakes, either. Be brave enough to step outside of your comfort zone and share yourself with others and with the world itself.

BODY:

The body is an extraordinary vessel that gives us the opportunity to experience life here on Earth. It heals itself and asks for very little. Though our bodies are not who we are on a soul level, they must be respected. It’s important for us to treat them with the right care and consideration in order for us to optimize our Earthly experience. Know what you’re putting into your body. You wouldn’t blindly take up someone else’s belief system that’s thrown at you, and the same should be true for your body. This holds true on both a physical level and how you view your body.

When you’re choosing the foods you eat, research what they contain. Try your best to eat a healthy, well-rounded diet. So often we deem food and exercise as “things for other people,” but simple changes can have profound effects – not experienced or felt until they’re put into practice. The better we treat our bodies, the higher our energy will be, and the more adequately prepared we’ll be for the challenges we face and the things we’d like to accomplish.

Be sure to not let the opinions or lifestyles of other people overtake you. Though you should be receptive to science and information provided to you, it’s incredibly important to live life on your own terms. If people around you have a body image issue, don’t take their issue on yourself. Be comfortable in your body, listen to it, and work in concert with it. The more in sync you are with your body, the more you will be in all areas of your life. The best practice to put in place with the body is one with discipline. If you’re not a person who naturally thinks to exercise or eat properly, start making a list and follow it one task at a time without glossing over all of it and feeling overwhelmed. Some people have a hard time taking initiative on their own, so seek out community and try to get a friend or a group together to exercise or construct some meal plans together. Not only is it helpful to have people in your circle who are on the same page, but it’s fun and exciting and will help elongate the momentum you build.

SOUL:

Taking action on a soul-level is the most important thing you can do for yourself. Your soul is who, what, where, how, and why you are. If you don’t connect to it, your foundation will be rocky at best. Because the soul is not a physical entity, people often make the mistake of thinking it’s wishy-washy and can be viewed and treated as such. That mentality can’t be farther from the truth, and should instead be approached with as much discipline and severity as any other part of your life. Grounding or centering yourself will help you cope with the stressors and drama of living life as a human being. If you’re sensitive, you’ll pick up on other people’s energies easily and sometimes it’s hard to tune these frequencies out. Most of us in our daily lives encounter a vast array of people, both online and off. Without noticing it, we’re picking up on the vibrations they emit – and usually, we’re taking them with us into our very private, sacred places within us without even noticing it. This is one of the root causes of having anxiety or feeling “off” without good reason. If you’re feeling this way, start to peel the layers off like an onion. Whenever an untoward thought or feeling creeps its way into your being, single it out and affirm that it is not a part of your life path or what you need to experience at this time. Keep repeating this until you’ve sent away all that no longer serves you.

When you experience thoughts or feelings that make you uncomfortable but are in fact lessons you need to experience, simply quiet the mind and step into your own private stillness. Then, ask what it is you need to learn from this lesson and how you can process it in an non-harmful, peaceful way. This method can be put in place in all areas of your life with all issues. Remember that the experience is not the same as how we interpret it; though Earth can be a very rigorous and grueling place to grow and evolve, we endure experiences because they’re for our higher good – or someone else’s. If you have a traumatic experience but process it in a healthy way, you can then go on to share the experience with others in a beneficial way which can help prevent pain and turmoil in their lives.

Another great way to connect to the soul is by means of breathing exercises and meditation. So many people write these two things off because they’ve been branded as something exclusive to monks or spiritual masters. On the contrary, these two processes are readily and easily accessible to all. When doing a breathing or meditation exercise, focus on quieting the body down. Get yourself into a comfortable position that won’t distract you in any way. This can mean lying down, sitting upright in a chair, sitting pretzel-style  on the floor, or any other position that resonates with you. There truly is no wrong way – it is your experience, and yours alone. When you’ve gotten comfortable, visualize a white light pouring in from the top of your head down through to your toes. This represents pure, cleansing energy that helps to wipe out all the debris within you in all forms. Once you’re filled with this light, take a deep breath in through the nose and visualize this air as being entirely pure, safe, clean, positive, and invigorating. Hold your breath for a few seconds and then exhale through the mouth. The exhale should represent the emptying out of anything negative or that which you wish to do away with. The meditation part generally happens quite naturally after the breathing exercise. Simply relax and enter a very serene, safe place within you that isn’t contingent upon anything Earthly or man-made. Most people find this to be a place of rejuvenation and will receive some of their best ideas for creative projects or future endeavors.

After you’ve connected with your soul, you won’t differentiate you and your soul as being apart from one another. You’ll simply feel connected, whole, and at one with the Universe. All of the best and most important work comes from this place within you, so trust in it and allow for it to grow into something magnificent.

Affirmation:

“I am fully capable of taking charge of my life. I’m making the commitment in the present moment to use my energy for the betterment of my life as opposed to the destruction of it. I become the reality I allow for, and I choose the reality that serves my highest good and the highest good of those around me.”

Blake,Kaiden
Kaiden Blake

Kaiden Blake, recognized internet personality and artist, is currently anticipating the release of his forthcoming book. Kaiden’s incredibly strong bond with his fans, inspire personal empowerment across the globe.

Brick Wall Beliefs

Dianne Bailey pic
Dianne Bailey
The Conditioning Classroom

What if someone told you to run as fast as you can into the side of a brick building — they convinced you that you had the power to run through walls just like in the movies and you tried it. And then after two weeks in the hospital and six weeks of rehab, you could finally walk again. OK, so now someone else is telling you to run into what looks like a brick wall. Would you do it? Of course not! Not unless they show you that it’s really just a towel that only looks like a brick wall and will easily move aside when you run through it. Many of the things that we believe to be solid brick walls in the world of fitness are really just towels that — when you finally believe you can run past them — they move quietly to the side and let you through.

What brick-wall beliefs are you holding on to? Let’s examine a couple:

Eating more will make me fat!

As you run toward this one, do you believe you can run through it, or does it stop you flat? You’ve been to the seminars with the fitness professionals and the nutrition specialists who tell you that you need to eat enough to support your body. If you starve yourself, your body will actually hold onto the fat because it wants to survive. But you’ve also heard over and over again that you need to eat less to lose weight. If you reduce your calories by 3,500 in a week, you will lose one pound of fat, right? So you should really just count calories, right? But the true professionals are telling you to eat enough to support your body and your goal of losing weight. You need to concentrate on eating the right foods each day: lean proteins, complex carbohydrates and good fats, and not just focus on calories. Eat more to weigh less, they say.

Can you accept this fact and run toward that brick wall, believing it is merely a towel that will wave as you blow past it? I know it sounds difficult because that brick wall seems so real — but you need to believe the science and your trainer, your doctor, your dietician. Run confidently toward lasting success in changing your body.

I won’t get lean unless I add hours of cardio to my workout routine.

This is a huge misconception, and a big brick wall that stops a lot of people, that hours of cardio are necessary to creating a lean body. Consider Heather, who was a successful competitive bodybuilder. She spent 2 hours a day on any number of cardio machines as she prepared for her competitions. Then she had kids, 2 beautiful children for whom she is very grateful and with whom she now enjoys each day to the fullest. She came to me to “get her body back and feel better about herself.” She didn’t want to compete anymore, but she wanted to get back into her pre-pregnancy clothes. As we started her program, she kept asking me when we would start incorporating the intensive cardio that she was used to.I told her that she really didn’t need it. She trusted me…sort of. She nervously followed the program that she later realized fit, amazingly, into her life. Just minutes each day — not hours. Time to spend with her kids. Real food — clean food — not coolers filled with plain chicken that she had to haul along on her vacations. Heather ran toward that brick wall that she thought was solid, that wall that told her she needed to kick up her cardio into high gear. She didn’t realize it was just a towel that looked like a brick wall until she went into her closet and tried on clothes that she hadn’t worn since before her children were born. Those clothes fit, and looked better on her than even before her competition! She was able to run right through that brick wall that said she needed to commit hours each day to cardio in order to look and feel her best!

These are just two examples of common “brick wall” beliefs.

What beliefs are holding you back from real success? Take some time to examine your goals and the typical way you approach them. Do you try to lose weight by starving yourself? By spending hours doing cardio on boring machines? Maybe you should re-examine your beliefs and trust the fitness professional in your life to help you run through these brick walls into the gratifying arena of true success!

Dianne has been providing professional weight management and sports conditioning training for individuals since 2002 and opened The Conditioning Classroom, a private personal training studio, in 2006. She earned the prestigious designation of Certified Strength Conditioning Specialist from the National Sports Conditioning Association in 2007. Dianne is dedicated to helping others learn to truly live as opposed to simply existing. From self-defense classes which teach living as an acute response, to helping create the right exercise and nutrition plan so that life becomes chronically enjoyable, Dianne and the trainers at The Conditioning Classroom have helped countless numbers of individuals become vibrantly alive!

Email your fitness questions to Dianne at:

DBailey@TheConditioningClassroom.com

TCCLCC

Ultimate Self-Defense

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Imagine you had the ability to embark on a journey into a brave new world, one in which you have never seen or heard of, one in which you do not speak the language and no one even really resembles you. The purpose of your journey is to navigate this new world, its terrain and elements, master its’ inhabitants’ language, and align with its’ culture. If successful, you have would have the opportunity to experience a new world full of natural beauty, empathetic compassion, soulful inter-connection and a myriad of physical sensations. Additionally, this new adventure holds the potential to learn skills and concepts beyond your current imagination. Your mind would expand exponentially. Best of all, this new environment is one full of hope, excitement and support where you can live, learn, grow and love in peace and safety. 

What would you feel like and how would you behave once you have returned from your journey? How would it change you? Would you want your loved ones to go to the same place and have the same experience that you had? Would you dedicate your time and effort in assisting with their ability to journey as you did?

The fact is that we, as human beings, have already made the jump into that journey.

The day before you were born, you were very much alive. You did not breathe as you do now, but absorbed your oxygen and nutrients from the fluid that surrounded you. What you heard of the sounds of the world, and whatever you could see, also first passed through this same fluid. You had virtually no control of your body, knew nothing of the new world’s language, and had no idea what another human being even looked like. The journey you were on was completely foreign. If there were a way to infuse the knowledge to the vulnerable you that in 24 hours you would be breathing not water, but air for oxygen, eating food, learning the basics of a foreign language, navigate obstacles, see, hear and feel through new, yet undiscovered senses, in a land you could not even imagine, life would certainly at that point be utterly and completely unrecognizable to you. Yet, that is what ear  and every one of us have done. Our truth and very existence changed in yet a few precious moments. I wonder how many of us would  have in fact been brave and courageous enough to have been born, if given the choice?

There are other times in history where truths have changed. In Galileo’s time, the truth of the world was that its’ surface was flat. If we traveled to the “edge,” it was believed we would simply fall off into an endless abyss. Today we all know that concept was not the truth, simply “the truth of the time” and what the masses believed in, so for a while, it became their truth. What kind of spirit, fortitude, and belief in oneself, must it have taken for his theories to be pushed through until proven.

Then there were the myriad of courageous explorers in days gone by who traveled and colonized new lands. Armed with tools, ships and the like, their beliefs and sheer will were probably among their most important assets to continue onward. They just kept pushing forward toward a new world, a new life, and new truths. 

The funny thing about some truths, is that they are not just there waiting to be discovered. There is no concrete substance to a truth that one seeks and then finds. Truth exists only in the minds of those who believe it, and the resulting culture is the manifestation of those thoughts and beliefs. Truth is evidenced into existence through action and behavior.

Fast forward to 2014 and our cultures have their own sets of current truths. One truth is that we live in a place of much beauty. Our lands are graced with natural beauty from majestic mountains to red rock canyons to turquoise waters and pure sandy beaches. We are blessed with an abundance of colors, changing and blending constantly everywhere, different species of life to live amongst and learn from, and the power of self-renewing passion and inner strength, that we can draw from and share with others of our own kind. Yet, there are other truths. The truths that some subscribe to that cause humans to choose to kill each other, imprison each other, torment, deny, and destroy each other. Clearly the former are simply supplied to us, luckily we come by such beauty naturally. Violence is always a choice. One that begins in the mind, out of fear.

The day before we were born we had no choice, and we had no fear, only progression. There was only one way to go, forward, and why not? Hopefully, that transition was into loving arms and a new beautiful world full of hope and possibility. That was the truth for some people, and not for others. Clearly then there is no one truth, and the only thing we can control is ourselves. There is only your truth that you bring to the world through your thoughts and your actions. This is our choice as human beings.

What would you choose if you had no fear? What could you become? Would you choose to shine with beauty as a gift to all those around you if you knew you would be accepted? Would you, like Galileo, take the natural gifts in front of us and pursue new ways to interpret and combine these elements to open up the boundaries of our environment? Or maybe it is simply enough to see the need in just one other person, and respond. If you are reading this, you probably have been around long enough to figure out, that there are many improvements we can make in the way we are living today and we could all use a little more grace.

No one asked you years ago if you were brave and courageous enough to leave the only home you ever knew and be born alone into a strange new one.Today, however, you can ask yourself if you are brave enough to choose a new attitude of enlightened empowerment, enhanced encouragement, deeper consideration, empathy, kindness, and support. If we did accept this challenge, that would certainly be the ultimate form of self-defense, because we simply would not need any.

How brave will you be in 2014?

Integrative Self-Defense

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What is Integrative Self-Defense?

Integrated Self-Defense is the process by which self-defense, be it of your body, emotions, spirituality, mind, or other part of “you” is incorporated into your psyche, allowing you not only to know self-defense, but to believe 100% that you are worth defending.  I believe that for many women, self-defense is like receiving a compliment. You know you have received one, appreciate that you have, but somewhere on the inside, doubt our worthiness. Integrative self-defense is believing that you are worth defending, much the same way we would believe in other things without question.

You already possess this ability. You always have. When you were younger, you took things on face value. If someone you trusted told you something, like a parent or teacher, you simply believed them. End of story. It became your truth. Then you ventured out into the world and realized you had your own truth, some of your beliefs from childhood fit your truth some did not. That is how we differentiate from one and another.

Many of our “truths” have come from places that have ulterior motives for us believing in them. They may come from media, societies, peer pressure, family pressure, men, other women, or even people who have not come to their own truths and tinker with yours in the process. We may feel wounded, hollowed out in our stomachs. We respond by putting up our defenses, but often these defenses come out in ways that make matters worse.

Integrative defense is simply identifying when someone or something has crossed our boundaries and believing that we have the right to respond to it in a way that minimizes or eliminates our exposure. We do not have to be uncomfortable at the hands of others, only at the hands of ourselves when we are looking to grow.

Wouldn’t it be a different world, if we believed we are worth defending every time we hear a put down, or face an unfounded insecurity, experience peer pressure, consider our body image, or the myriad of other doubts that we face on an almost every day basis? Certainly we do feel these ways, whether we realize it or not, and we do respond.

The goal of Integrated Self-Defense, therefore, is to create an unconscious internal, cellular belief system that responds appropriately in the face of personal boundary infringement. We all have the right to develop in a positive environment, and to believe that we deserve to.  After all, how can we be accountable for our own actions if we are dictated by others?

~KBC

To Believe or Not to Believe?

f04212ff17e710eac8030a8aaf583713It all comes down to what you believe.  Don’t you think? Some people believe the following so they don’t act today:

  • I’m young, I’ll quit smoking when I’m older
  • Someone else will do it
  • I don’t need health insurance, I’m healthy
  • I live in a good neighborhood, I’m not worried about crime
  • The Red Sox will never win a World Series at Fenway
Well, we know what happened with the Red Sox, and look how unlikely THAT was! (sorry Bosox fans)!
The fact is that what we believe becomes our truth, but that is not necessarily “the world’s truth”.
The world is full of marvelous, beautiful, inspiring truths, however, that is not always the case. There are plenty of ugly truths out there in the world. I am quite sure everyone is aware that rapes, kidnappings, domestic violence, murder and the like happen every day, in far away lands, and our own, and in every country around the world. I am far to believe that anyone is in denial about this. However, if you took a poll and asked how many of those same people who believe this have learned personal self-defense, I think the number of “no” answers would be alarming. Why?
I think there are several reasons, carrying some validity. Here are my thoughts:
  1. I have taken precautions, I lock my doors, have an alarm system and have created a barrier environment around my place of residence.Great! But that won’t help you if barriers are broken. If that were enough, there would be no breaking and entering, rape, murder etc..People break the barriers others set for themselves every single day in a myriad of ways. It is just a matter of how far one will go once they are broken, and one never knows.
  2. I live in a safe neighborhood and crime is virtually non-existent here.  Crime is everywhere. You may live in a neighborhood, where the likelihood is less, and that’s great, but there is no neighborhood in the world where there is no crime. There is no such thing as a SAFE neighborhood, only SAFER neighborhoods.  There are victims in every neighborhood and if you or a loved one are the victim, you will no longer believe that you live in a safe place. 
  3. I know how to protect myself/my family. Really? Doing something is better than doing nothing, but unless you have fought off an attacker(s) successfully while in a state of panic, in a systematic way that can be repeated, the truth is you only “think” you know the answer to that question. The truth is you need practice, you need to be trained and you need to be attacked in a high adrenaline scenario to know if you can be effective. And even that is no guarantee because you will know that is part of your training, but it is a heck of a way to give yourself some leverage in the event of a real attack!
  4. I am smart, alert to my surroundings and make good decisions. Wonderful! That’s half the battle, however, does anyone really believe that the only victims of crime are stupid, unaware and make poor decisions? I do not want to compromise the importance of being alert and making good decisions as this is crucial to one’s safety, but the sad truth is that bad things happen to smart, alert and good decision makers every day.

I am not a doom sayer. Those who know me know I believe in beauty. I do my best to accept world reality and I will guard against attack.

Please go get the training you need to defend yourself! Teach your children to defend themselves. This is not teaching your children to fight, it is about teaching your children to protect themselves. Do you look both ways before you cross the street, even though you may live in a less trafficked neighborhood? Do you teach your children to do the same? Of course you do, because getting hit by a car is not worth the effort it takes to look both ways and prevent from being hit. It is no different with personal protection. Being a victim of an attack is not worth the effort it takes to learn skills to protect yourself. Don’t believe me? Ask any attack victim if they could go back in time and learn more skills, that is if you now one who has survived.
~KBC